A Monopoly on Empathy: Using a Board Game to Prompt Empathy in Your Church

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Think with us?

A group of us have spent six weeks discussing how churches might step outside their buildings into more intentional relationship with their surrounding communities.

So far we’ve covered a lot of territory by think-tanking through 6 of the 33 exercises from Portable Faith: Taking Church to the Community. (See What If Your Church Burned Down?, Community Stations, Would You Let Your Families Intermix, Walk a Mile In Their Shoes, What We Say In Public and the Truth About Money.)

Here’s another short excerpt from a multi-part excercise featured in the book. (The actual exercise is couched between other related preparatory exercises and post-activity reflections.)

A Monopoly on Empathy

1. Ask people to bring in their Monopoly games if you are doing this exercise with a large group, and it would be helpful to have several boards. Set up a game of Monopoly in which the game is slightly altered (so that some players are “born” with disproportionate wealth and some with great need). Play with normal rules, but distribute money, the listed properties, and houses/hotels (according to the guidelines provided in Portable Faith) at the start of the game.

(According to the directions in the book, some players will be given thousands upon thousands of dollars and matching sets of properties, while others will have little money and no property.)

2. Play the game according to normal rules for 15 minutes, then stop (unless someone wins before the 15-minute mark).

3. When the 15 minutes are up, ask the group to discuss the following questions:

  • How did you feel when you saw how much you started with or were “born” with? What did you feel about your chances of success?
  • As the game progressed, was there ever a point where someone felt frustrated or helpless in game play? Describe why that happened.
  • Did anyone at the table display arrogance or gloat?
  • Did anyone at the table feel guilty or apologetic? Why?
  • Did anyone at the table cheat or consider cheating? Why?
  • If your goal was to win, did the new rules make the game harder or easier?
  • Did any of your real life experiences (actual instances of excess or need, for example) impact the way you participated in the game?
  • How might these experiences transfer to real life?

What do you think? Can brief experiences like this invite empathy or understanding regarding other people’s situations? How could this exercise be modified to invite large groups (or individuals) to think about the impact of real life economic disparity? What are the challenges involved in playing in a group setting? And what kind of context to do you see this activity working best?

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25 Comments

  • comment-avatar
    Doug Bradshaw May 13, 2013 (1:31 pm)

    Great exercise. Just shared it with my lead youth worker and he loved it. We could see it working in the youth group setting real well. Maybe we could do some video follow-up with the students after they play and record their answers to the questions. We both agreed that the handing out of the money ahead of time would create tension which would cause students to respond. I really think this is a great setting as students would be more likely to share a response that is authentic. I fear adults would respond in accordance with their economic state. I see this as a “can’t miss” deal. I only wonder if the adults will be willing to let this speak to them.

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    Eric Haynes May 13, 2013 (3:12 pm)

    When I led a group of teens on a missions trip to Croc, Mexico with YouthFront (an organization out of Kansas City), they had our team play a similar game, but life-size. They placed the “game board” around the room on chairs, gave different people different amounts of money and resources, and you rolled your dice and walked around the room doing the various activities on each square. Though we didn’t buy property, we did gain or lose basic resources based on our socio-economic status.

    I think it made a huge impression on the teens, especially as they watched the wealthy get richer and the poor get poorer (or worse). It was interesting to watch the attitudes of those who were rich or poor as they played the game (and got into their roles). My son still talks about his experience 3 years later.

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      Sarah May 20, 2013 (8:10 am)

      Thanks @Eric. I like the idea of it being life-size. Of course any such experience is just a starting point…I see it as cracking the window of awareness. :)

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    Ray Hollenbach May 13, 2013 (3:14 pm)

    Like Doug, I think this exercise would work well in a youth setting, and I like the idea of doing a video of students as they played the game. I think it would be useful to define what it means to “win the game,” but perhaps ask those who participate if they MUST play by the rules they are given. What I’m getting at is to spur a discussion along the lines of “Who makes the rules,” and what it truly means to win in life. As to Doug’s last question, I suspect a sizable number of adults would not be willing to let this exercise speak to them.

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      Sarah May 20, 2013 (8:11 am)

      Ray, I love the question about how to define who “wins” — redefining that is definitely the point and that keeps with a couple of the other portions of the book too. Nice add.

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    danielle Williams May 13, 2013 (3:37 pm)

    I think this would be great to do. It allows us the opportunity to see Hpws others have to live. It also helps us show compassion for people that may not have as much as the next person.
    As for the individual it would be great to see how your heart and attitude is towards people. I love it!
    I also agree it maybe better in a youth group setting, but i would like to see how many adults would like to do it.

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      Sarah May 20, 2013 (8:12 am)

      Thanks, Danielle! I hope it’d be a step toward building more empathy and compassion…

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    Teresa B Pasquale May 13, 2013 (10:44 pm)

    Agreed that it sounds great for youth groups. It sounds a bit like a youth group exercise my husband has done for years with really potent outcomes around food where people are given “tickets” for the amount of food they can afford (which are related to the kind and quantity of food for different nations) in arbitrary allotments–so some people only get a handful of rice, other a potato, and others get meat and vegetables and sides…and then after everyone eats their meal based on their “country” they all review how it felt with many of the same questions.

    I really like it with youths; I had not thought of trying the same thing with adults…I think it could work but I also worry that adults might not be able to delve into it with full honesty; maybe seeing through it too fast to really get the benefit of feeling the experience…that said, I think it is always great to explore and act out these dynamics to learn our inner feelings around have/have not.

    One really powerful exercise I have seen done I have seen in the setting of a holocaust museum, an AIDS epidemic in an African nation, and other populations and historical experiences of equal potency is where people get the name of a person and through the experience they learn little bits about that person’s journey and only at the end of the exercise do they learn whether that person lived or died. That is only tangentially similar but something I think made the experience of another’s story and life become so palpable for people at any age.

    I did something sort of like that for our Yom Hashoah service where I selected the stories of children and adolescents who were killed during the holocaust and had each community member read a story…which included their story of life and their death.

    I think whatever the exercise when people feel it inside in that deep abiding place then whatever the activity is there are riches to mine.

    • comment-avatar
      Sarah May 20, 2013 (8:12 am)

      Teresa, I love the food-ticket idea. That drives it home in a very memorable way. I’ll have to think about having you share that!

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    Benji May 14, 2013 (12:54 pm)

    I agree with all the comments above, that the first thing that crossed my mind was a high school sophomore doing this activity in a small group setting. I think that most adults have an understanding that their are different social/financial classes. However, I love the idea of doing this in a “real life” with a big room where people physically move around the board and step into cubicles that are “homes” that portray different social statuses. Almost like the Compassion Experience trailers. . . interesting to see if you could produce this in an environment for adults.

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      Sarah May 20, 2013 (8:14 am)

      Interesting. I’ve done the Monopoly game with adults many times, but usually in the context of a one day training. I like your reference to the Compassion Experience trailers. That might be a lot for a small church to decorate and arrange cubicles, but it’d be a great way to walk through a similar experience.

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    Rick Nier May 15, 2013 (5:30 pm)

    I absolutely could see myself using this in a youth setting. But I think it would work well in adult small groups. I could also see using a simpler game and providing the same kind of picture for children.

    It’s a good lesson for larger groups, so I wonder if you could lead a small group through this exercise and then video an extreme version of this, with a few one-liners and perhaps staging people to act out the obvious frustrations and perhaps lead others into deeper conversations.

    I think the biggest challenge for an exercise like this is that people (US citizens) have heard that even our middle-class are among the most wealthy in the world. So it might be difficult to communicate this in a way that gets past their disbelief and wondering how they still barely pay the rent.

    Good stuff, Sarah!

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      Sarah May 20, 2013 (8:15 am)

      I actually have never thought about doing it for young children. I may need to get my little guy to play and see how it shakes out. :) Sure there’s a way it could be simplified. Even using dollar bills and change… you’ve got me thinking!

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    Michele May 17, 2013 (11:22 am)

    I love this! I think it would be really interesting to see it in an adult Sunday School setting ..just throwing it in and then teaching the lesson afterwards…I’m going to hang on to this idea for just the right moment that I’m sure will present itself!

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      Sarah May 20, 2013 (8:16 am)

      Michele, I do think it’d work for adult groups who have a comfort level in interacting with each other. :) I’m glad you do too!

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    Wes May 17, 2013 (2:39 pm)

    As one who has actually done this exercise, with Sarah, I can say that it was a very powerful and memorable experience. We were college juniors, and, apart from living in a third world country after college, was the most enlightening experience I’d had till then about how to relate to those who have less (or more) than I do.

    It’s unfortunate that so many above have mentioned that this exercise might only work with youth. Or, it’s unfortunate that adults wouldn’t be so open to having this exercise work with them. I agree that smaller groups would probably be better–although, as proposed–if the game was videotaped, other, larger groups could watch it and discuss.

    What was most powerful for me in the exercise is that it wasn’t explained until afterwards what it was we were doing. The “new rules” were explained, and then we just played. Then, I think, because it was “a game”, people were more prone to be honest about how they felt.

    One other version we played was like welfare. One person owned all the properties, but couldn’t let anyone lose. If another player couldn’t afford the rent, this one player paid for everything. The other players quickly became hopeless and bored–they couldn’t get ahead in the game (cuz one player owned everything), and they also couldn’t lose and go on to something else. Powerful, I tell you–powerful for creating empathy.

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      Sarah May 20, 2013 (8:18 am)

      Wes, interesting you say that, because this game leads to a welfare discussion.

      I think it might be uncomfortable for adults, but I am not sure I buy it doesn’t work. I’ve done it with many adult groups through the years and while there are those who share less inevitably, usually the whole group comes around because the most talkative members break the ice. ;)

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    Todd May 17, 2013 (4:15 pm)

    Like others, I think that this quite easily fits within the confines of a youth group activity with little to no advance framing. However, I like the idea of utilizing this type of activity in working with college students and young professionals as well. In my mind, the emerging adult population (particularly those just leaving college) might be the most important setting for this game to be conducted. You could add in other nuances like college degrees and other similar opportunities that are not available evenly to all people. Further, these students are in the right stage in life (they are still flexible in their thinking) that they could reasonably be changed by the experience to reframe their view on opportunities that they have been afforded and the ways that they can/should be called to give back to others. It might be useful to follow such an activity up with a planning session for how the particular group can serve others who have not received the same opportunities they have.

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      Sarah May 20, 2013 (8:19 am)

      Todd, yes! I think you could modify the game of life or something similar to accomplish the same thing with different variables. Good call.

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    Vicki Hanes May 18, 2013 (11:23 am)

    Not so sure about it, to be honest. Maybe because I do simulations often, I wonder if I or others would kind of see through the objective of this and be a little too politically correct. So, I’m not sure I’m a good judge of this one. I think giving people a real life challenge might be a good modification of this. Give out cards one week with different amounts to each person and then ask them to live 1 week on the daily or weekly amount given. Have them try to budget first and then actually try to live with that budget. They have to consider the gas they use, the electricity they use and of course food and lodging costs on a daily or weekly basis. Then you could discuss the feelings of being “given” easier or harder amounts to work with, the experience of trying to do this and how much time and energy is put in the thought of some things that we normally don’t think about. I think getting people as close to the real thing is going to be a little more effective with adults. Also, there is a past TV series called 30 Days that experiments with this idea. It doesn’t go into the idea that we don’t always start in the same place, but it does go into the difficulty of living on minimum wage and might help people consider the things they would need to budget or think about.

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      Sarah May 20, 2013 (8:21 am)

      Vicki, I like that idea too, but I think people might be less likely to participate. If they would, though, I agree, that’s an awesome experience that is even more true to life. Love the way you’d want to challenge people!

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      Sarah May 20, 2013 (8:21 am)

      Just wanted to say I love the idea about 30 Days too.

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    Becky May 20, 2013 (4:07 pm)

    This is AWESOME!!! Totally suggesting that we use this in one of our homebased staff meetings at my regular job. This is a great idea for use with youth as well… they are sooo much easier to work on changing ideas.

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    Amy Jones May 26, 2013 (10:07 pm)

    I think this is an awesome idea! Agree with the addition of defining “who wins”. Like the idea of life sized that was done with the youth. At the not-for-profit I used to work for, we had done a mock poverty simulation, for adults and community leaders where they had to experience going to different mock locations to get assistance and walking through the processed they are often put through or they were given a certain amount of assistance for the month and had to decide how they would survive with what had and resources available. Sometimes people have no idea what it is really like to be really poor until they are faced with the hands on reality. This was eye opening for many people and after the simulation there was discussion and a time of brainstorming.

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